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Writing Showcase
There will be four sections, (Planning and Exploratory Writing, Peer Review, Self Review, and Revision), that show my writing process for the whole quarter. My entire writing creation revolves around this question of how Disney conducts the social construction of gender roles.
Planning and Exploratory Writing
Close Reading Practice: Looking into the Magic Mirror, Haas and Trapdeo
This is a screenshot of close reading practice. The thesis of my essay is basically determined after reading Haas and Tradepo's essay. In this essay, the authors present the history of Disney animated film development in chronological order. After reading it, I found that I could compare different female characters to find how Disney has embedded the social construction of gender roles into it.
Discuss Podcast Topics with My Groupmates
I think this assignment shown in the image is to help me the most in my writing. That is a discussion about the topic of the podcast with my group members. I started to conceive the structure of my essay when I was doing this assignment. You can see that in this discussion, I mentioned the three stages of Disney Princess changes. In my writing, I also divided the body paragraph into three stages to discuss how Disney contributes to the social construction of gender roles.
Peer Review
My Suggetion to Other Classmate
I think this peer review of the introductory is the best. When I was doing this peer review, I always think about how the structure should make the introductory more natural. Besides, I could see if I have missed any part in my introductory. When I corrected my classmate's introductory, the part that she had missed made me go back and re-checked my essay. When I was doing peer review to other students, I gave a very detailed suggestion. For example, in the picture, you can see that this student lacks interesting sentences. I not only pointed out this problem but also proposed specific solutions.
The Best Peer Review I Received
I think the suggestion in the picture is the most useful to me. She provided me with many details that show the place I need to revise and was very objective. For example, I analyzed many of Disney’s gender construction in this paragraph. Still, I missed the point that I did not give a specific scene or other evidence to support it, but this classmate found out and gave me a good adjustment plan.
Self Review
When I was doing a self-review, I discovered that I had many repetitive languages, which caused some sentences and paragraphs to be wordy and accounted for a large part of the word count. This is a severe problem in my essay. This is the biggest problem in my essay. So I need to revise it.
On the organization part, my thesis statement does not match the content discussed in the following paragraphs. Like the mistake shown in the picture, I did not compare male and female characters in the following paragraphs but only compared female characters. So when I am revising, I will revise this thesis statement.
Revision
Before
After
After finishing the self-review, I have a deeper understanding of the essay. So, I decided to merge these two separate paragraphs. The first paragraph is mainly to analyze the social and historical background, and the second paragraph is to analyze the role of Disney. Combining these two paragraphs can better reflect how Disney socially constructs gender roles and what changes Disney wants to make.
Before
After
Dr. Haas’s comment inspires me. She suggested that I could only include the comparison between different princesses, so I adopted her suggestion, and I changed the thesis statement and omitted the male character comparison part when I did the self-review. This makes my
thesis statement more precise and logical.
Final Essay
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